We all have been reading the news and watching television, each month individuals are suffering from job loss or job cuts resulting in high unemployment, a few of you have even lost your jobs in the last 6-9months, while health insurance is increasing and health benefits are decreasing. Industries such as Financial, Automotive and Retail are being hit the hardest with more industries to come; or at least this is what we are being told. It is very easy during this time to allow fear to consume and prevent you from focusing on the one true God who can move all challenges, obstacles, concerns, and doubt. Now don't get me wrong the recession is real, and to be honest my household is feeling the affects of job loss as the NFL is having administrative job cuts, the AFL has completely folded until further notice and trying to manage off of a shrunken income budget is difficult. As it is easy to think about what is Not going well in each of our lives and the financial strain each of us may be enduring. I have learned as we go through these cycles of change the one constant is keeping our heart and mind open to hearing God's voice and the direction he has for our lives. This requires trusting and believing in God especially when times are good and even when times of what we believe are bad. This requires praying, and also praying with your husband or partner, praying his word over your life and your circumstances and reading his word. Now I have not always been true to following the advice in which I am giving, but I do know when I focus on my God and not my problem, when I pray and read his word my life and situation always turns out for my good. Life is too short to spend in fear, doubt or even complaining about what we do not have. I am a living witness that GOD will make a way out of no way. I can not think of the many times in the past few months when I wondered how in the world am I going to pay the light bill, my mom sends a surprise check in the mail which covered the cost of the light bill; or when a visa gift card came right in time for the holidays, or when I was traveling on business and an error with the airlines resulted in refund of funds to cover another bill. Now I am not advocating living check to check LOL LOL... This is actually foolish, and we as a society and people have to do better to spend wisely and save properly for not only difficult times, but for our children and childrens childrens; but there are times and circumstances which are out of our control where this will happen. The key is learning from the experience and making the proper provisions to overcome. I for one can see my breakthrough and it is close, and I am and will use my personal testimony to say even if you have suffered job cuts or job loss, it is not the end of life or your livelihood. The key is working through the difficulties and coming out stronger, wiser and yes even more prosperous than before. Which is why it is important for all to read GODs word, meditate over his word so you may hear his voice in what he has in store for you and your family. During tough economic times it is very easy to blame each other, or for bitterness and resentment to creep into the marriage. Arguments begin and you don't know why, even affairs can begin during financial strains, don't allow the devil to penetrate your thoughts and cause confusion within your marriage and relationship as we know God is of peace and the devil is of confusion. Remember economic strains only endure for a moment while joy endures for a lifetime. If you are equally yoked with your spouse or partner you must understand you are going to experience difficulties, but keeping love alive and strong through communication, laughter, hugs, kisses and yes if you are married making love while also reading God's word will ensure your marriage and relationship weathers the storm. Now I am no doctor, or Psychologist , but what I am is a child of GOD who has gone through experiences which have shaped me into the wife, mother, sister, friend and daughter that I am today. Here are some scriptures I read or have read during times of difficulty:
Matthew 5:27-37 (teaching of adultery, divorce and vows)
Matthew 6:25-34 (teaching not to worry about day to day things, money, food etc.)
Matthew 7:24-27 (ensuring each household builds a strong foundation)
Matthew 19:4-12 (discussion about divorce and marriage)
Proverbs 5:1-23 (discussion on how husbands should treat their wives)
Proverbs 31:10-31 (discussion on how wives should treat their husbands)
Philippians 4:6-7 (discussion on how to overcome fear and worry)
I could go on and on, but these are things both you and your spouse can read to strengthen your marriage especially during tough times such as what we are dealing with today financially; also remember if your spouse has not fully come to know who Jesus Christ really is or his role in your marriage, no problem, don't you fret, you continue to pray for your spouse and your marriage, GOD hears all and how many times have we been saved by the prayers of someone else. So I end my post with I hope you have gotten something from me sharing a piece of my heart 2 yours and please post your thoughts or shared experiences you never know you may be a latern of hope and light for someone else.
Take Care and Always, GOD Bless~
knedwards-montgomery
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Wow, Queenie, Kim and Deirdre this is truly an awesome site. Queenie and Kim while I have known you ladies since our UH days, our lives have taken us on different paths. Our communication with each other is few and far between (sometimes even on a chance airline flight to Houston and Chicago :-) ) it is evidenced by this blog site, as women we often share the same joys, hurts, and challenges in life. I believe as this thing called “life” consumes us as people we forget to slow down and focus on ourselves, our marriages, children and friends. As a mother of a 15 month old (which a lot of days I still stop in amazement that I have child, those who know me understand) I see my son playing in his play area by himself because mom and dad are busy and I have to remind myself that I had this child to enjoy him and I shift my priority to him and stop what I am doing and go get on the floor and play with him. I think this blog site affords us the same opportunity to shift our priority and focus on us. So with that said thank you ladies for this forum.
ReplyDeleteNow as it relates to the topic of the month. Since Queenie has already touched on the spiritual aspect, I think it is important to talk openly and honestly about the current times and the impact of that on your family. Also, I think it is important to talk through what if scenarios before they happen. My husband is very good at this, which used to get on my nerves a lot, however, I have grown to accept this part of his personality because it has worked to our advantage many of times. So be proactive with talking about what if scenarios if you or your loved one are laid off, put together a sample budget utilizing one income, would you need family financial support if so talk to them now about that, and if you would have to get another job right away start putting together your career resources tool (i.e. temporary agencies, companies you would consider working for, people you could network with).
I truly believe talking proactively about challenging situations ahead of time with you and your significant other or family really helps when you are in the midst of the situation. Trust me you do not want to realize that you and your significant other or family are at opposite ends of approaching the situation when you are in the middle of the crises. Then you are fighting the crisis AND the people you love, instead of just the crisis.
My 2 cents
Dwan
Hey cuz
ReplyDeleteIf u would have asked me a less than 9 months ago how i was doing financially and my response would have been great, fantastic. Still shopping daily, purchased a new truck, a couple of wide screen tvs. Never thought that I could fall victim to economic hard times. Well.... then my husband's job loss eventually caught up. And now I have sadly had to majorly cut back on my lavish spending. Now if u would have asked me like a year ago could i picture myself on a budget or a day w/out going shopping, i would have said, "r u crazy, a budget, no shopping... yeah right, not when i strategically matriculated and completed a professional degree and is currently established in my career, whatever..." Yeah I probably would have set something like that. But now thanks to my lovely sister who advances a loan here and there (even though she practices loan sharking), a terrific dad and a cool mom (who bird dog for a money back) I don't know how we (my family would have made it), well just say i would have really had to give up my life style entirely. So I thank my higher power (GOD) on a daily for the support system that i have. That would be my suggestion to all to maintain a support system and a strong faith in a higher power. Each together will encourage self-confidence and motivation to move forward and not to become stuck in a negative emotion thus developing irrational thinking and subsequent pathological behavior(s).
P.S. Weazle said that u need some pics... But the music sounds great
Dwan, you provided some exceptional advice, I would have to say I needed the advice about 30 days ago. As I am facing financial uncertainty with downsizing within my company. The great thing is I have always been a job hustler (you remember back in the day), so I have been in contact with recruiters, headhunters, professional blogs and everything else. I do feel positive as positions in HR/OD/T&D are still strong in the Houston Metro area. I have had a few call backs also, I am running into salary concerns of making too much; but I have never been afraid of having to take a few small salary steps backwards to take several giant salary steps forward. So I am reaching for the reasonable top and thanking God in Advance for what he can do when man can not. Very important to stay in positive spirits, trusting, reading my word, contacting creditors, and actively on a career search engine. I have seen first hand when my other friends who were or are laid off, took a few months to gather their thoughts and 6-9 months later they were or are in a panic because they have not found a new position. A job nor a career will not fall in your lap and when economically the world is struggling you must be relentless. So with the news of downsizing and layoffs, I am not waiting until I receive a package rather that is today or 9 months from now, I am on my grind and I know my efforts will produce fruitful rewards. Thanks Dwan as always for your rational and insightful advice. I have said before, although we dont talk or see each other often, or by chance on an airplane we bump into each other on a business trip:) lol lol. You were one of my true college friends who helped shape me into the woman I am today. Still silly, still laugh and laugh loud, and oh yes still dramatic, but much more focused on the prize, share and cares for others, a hard worker, stronger wife and loving mother. Thank you always for extending the olive branch, and always know Richmond, TX and the Edwards-Montgomery family always have love for you and your family. Who use to be my college road dog? Oh yes, that would be you, we have stories to tell for a life time from our Atlanta, Galveston and New Orleans trips. I love you dearly friend although I may not tell you, so I am telling you now!
ReplyDelete------
Yes cousin, the world has a way of turning things upside down when you least expect it, the important thing is to always learn from those experiences to make you better. The experience of falling helps you to plan better so the next time you don't fall or at least you don't fall as hard. We must learn to plan for the unexpected and to remember things we obtain are just that, things and they can be replaced, so we must not get so caught up in having the 2000 Gucci bag, the 750 pair of shoes, and the 300 weave (I love them all). Now I am not saying if you can afford them not to get them, I am simply saying we must not get so caught up in the materialism of it all, as God has a funny way of laying you flat on your back so you can place your focus on him and not your things. Once you focus on him, all the wealth in the natural will come so long as you maintain an open heart, ask for wisdom, read your word, treat others with kindness, minimize gossip and work hard to give back to others less fortunate than you may be. Great comments and feedback to the post cousin, and tell Weazle, the pictures of Kim, Dee and I are coming we just have to slow down long enough to get in the same room versus on text, email and phone to get it done. So hang tight WeeZee the pictures are coming.
I like to thank those who have commented, keep them coming as we have only 2 weeks left in the month of January and we will move on to the next topic of the month. The blog is their for us to dialog with each other as support and help. Speaking of help, Dwan is your company hiring in human resources? Yes we can use this blog to network too! lol lol
knedwards-montgomery "queenie"
Hey Queenie, unfortunately our company has filed for bankruptcy. So we have a hiring freeze on just about all positions. About a month or two ago I was looking at jobs in the Houston area and the City of Houston has some good paying HR jobs available. Also try www.hrhouston.org and www.shrm.org You don't have to be a member of either organization to view jobs. When I was first looking for jobs in Houston when I lived in Austin I received several call backs from companies that I applied for on hrhouston.org. If I hear of anything I will let you know.
ReplyDeleteDwan
Wow,
ReplyDeleteThis is horrible, thanks so much. I have been applying on both websights for the last 4 weeks. Funny I actually got a call back from the unemployment office contact. Keep me in prayer as I will do the same for you. Our country is simply moving from a greed driven society to back to the basics. Cream does rise to the top, but the coffee will get cold after a while. America is dealing with the coffee has gone cold and must find a different way to manage than simply by greed and spend, spend, spend. We must follow the traditionalist and early boomers and learn how to enjoy and spend, but also proceed with caution and save, without spending in fear or spending as though the money train will last forever. Much to learn from people who where born in 1922-1950
I am new to the blog and read the current month's topic first...but I have to say, this topic is equally amazing!!!
ReplyDeleteTo add my comment, I would have to agree that the generation before us can definitely shed some light on how to fit the pieces back together. I think that financial independence should be top priority for all families. I, too, am experiencing financial strain as I am the only working in my household. On top of that, I recently made a total career change and took a cut in pay. While my previous career would afford me the financial resources necessary to keep my household afloat, the stress that came with that job was not a welcome trade-off. In my case, I volunteered to take a severance package and was turned down three times. The management powers-that-be felt that I couldn't be serious since I had recently had another child. Whatever!!! So, like Queenie, I am a job hustler and I did what I needed to do to move over to the field of Education. And, I LOVE WHAT I DO!!!!! It has been the best decision for my family and I. While my purse strings have to be tightened due to only one income, my husband and I communicate often and work together so that we don't argue and the kids don't even know how tight our budget is from time to time. Along with teaching, I am also a Realtor and a Beauty Consultant. My point to all reading.....you should always have a plan 'B' and 'C'...with 'D' on the horizon. That way, you never have to give up your current lifestyle only yield the right away to the financial cycle. Have a powerful day!!!!
Amen, Amen, Amen~
ReplyDeleteI am a fan of knowing a tight budget wont last always either, only because our God's plans for us is for good. He wants us to be spritual leaders along with wealthy leaders in our community. You are correct the importance of having a plan A-C is critical and yup even a plan D. I must admit I was caught with only a plan B which is highly unusual for me; but what a wonderful life lesson I have learned from this. The key like you indicated is communication with your spouse when you are down to a one family income, and even when you both are bringing in 2 incomes. My husband and I after 13 years are still trying to get this right. After reading Dwans portion we have agreed to take a larger stand on communicating better on all issues, money, children, vacations, etc. Again, thank you for posting and we look forward to hearing from you in the future, we would love for you to become a member of OurHearts2Yours when we begin holding our monthly greetings.
I would love to become a member!!! I think this is an excellent way to network and build a strong bond of women who can relate to each other. While our lives travel in different paths day to day, we all have something in common AND we all can shed light from our experiences. I look forward to the monthly topics.
ReplyDeleteMichelle,
ReplyDeleteI would love for you to become a member, this is the whole purpose of working to start this social network. I am waiting on the final approval from the state of Texas to formulate a business here and then we are ready to go. I will contact you through Kim to tell you about the first meeting. I want this to be much like you indicated a place for women to share their common issues and joy and shed additional light from our experiences, and also as a group of women volunteering in the community to service our fellow man! See you soon~